During my devotions today, a few verses really hit home for me especially as I write my story. The title of my book is, “He Showed Me Why” and the reason for that is because of all the years I spent angry at God because of all the painful things I had gone through. Even though my head knows He never causes anything bad to happen to me and He only wants what is best for me, typically my first response during times of testing is to blame Him for it, to ask Him, “Why?!” Because of writing my testimony and reliving painful things I have gone through, I was strongly impacted by the words I read in Malachi 3:17 New King James Bible. "You have wearied the Lord with your words; Yet you say, ‘In what way have we wearied Him?’ In that you say….Where is the God of justice?” and then chapter 4:13-15 which says, “Your words have been harsh against Me, Says the Lord, Yet you say, ‘What have we spoken against You?’ You have said ‘It is useless to serve God; what profit is it that we have kept His ordinance…….For those who do wickedness are raised up.’” How often my emotions have mirrored those words. I live in Satan’s world which is set up to glorify and give success to the wicked while it beats down and mocks the righteous. Yet I still blame my “Daddy” when bad things happen in my life. When I read that I “weary the Lord” and even worse, “speak harshly against the Lord” when I allow myself to feel that way, it really grieved my heart and makes me want to have a heightened awareness to blame the right person when I am tested and hurting. I need to keep straight who is my enemy and who is always on my side and not let the devil succeed in making me think the unrighteous are the ones who have it made in this life.
Reading and meditating on verse 16 and 17 of the same 4th chapter in Malachi can help keep the right focus and attitude. It says, “So a book of remembrance was written before Him for those who fear the Lord and who meditate on His name. ‘They shall be Mine,’ says the Lord of hosts, ‘On the day that I make them My jewels. And I will spare them as a man spares his own son who serves him.’ Then you shall again discern between the righteous and the wicked, between one who serves God and one who does not serve Him.” I need to keep my eyes on Him and also, the reward He will bestow on His faithful servants instead of desiring the success and empty happiness given to those on the side of this world and its ruler. If I can do that, all of this darkness, pain, disappointment, confusion and injustice that I feel at times, will all be erased and made right.
This promise given to me as well as to you should be our strength. Hebrews 6:10,11,19 says, “For God is not unjust to forget your work and labor of love which you have shown toward His name….And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end…..This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast.” During the storms, let us never lose our anchor and may we walk in victory with Him.
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