Please pray for me.........

Well, this entry is of a more personal nature. I need to ask that you hold me up in prayer because I am a week into doing something that the Lord laid on my heart over a year ago. As you know, much has transpired in that time but there are to be no more delays!

A week ago, I began to gather research to write my autobiography. The Lord gave me the name of the book back then: “He Showed Me Why”. I know what the cover is going to look like. I have the dedication, the forward and the prolog. I have the outline and the first chapter written.

What I am doing now, is going through all of my journals, calendars and day planners and writing down all the notes or entries. I have made it to 2002 in the last week. Once I have done all of that up to present, then I am taking all of my pictures (and there are a lot!) and compiling them to match the timeline. Once that is all put together, I will then sit down and pull out the pictures and data from the time period for the chapter I am writing and will lay it all out before the Lord and ask Him to bring people, events and/or emotions to mind and give me the words that HE wants written. I can tell you that it has been a brutal week so far. I am blessed to have someone that is taking care of my very basic financial needs and that is enabling me to focus on this and nothing else until it is finished.

This project is costing me much though and I really need prayer to continue to the end.
There is a whole lot more “ugly” in my past than “pretty” or “good”. The Lord has shown me ways that He is going to use my story to help others on a variety of levels but it is taking its pound of flesh and heart in the process. I have made out a schedule that has me working on the book 4 hours a day and focusing on the blog on a regular basis as well. So I ask that you hold me up in prayer whenever the Lord lays me on your heart. If you could pray that He would help me to keep things in perspective and not beat up on myself for my past and that I would have the strength to stick with this no matter how hard it is. I also have scheduled Sunday to be a real, true day off, a day for rejuvenation and I need to be able to stick by that since the week is so hard for me emotionally. This is easier said than done since taking an entire day off every week seems to be a bad fit for this world and the way that most people function these days.

I don’t want to sound overly negative….I am aware of the God-given focus I have as well as the provision He has made for me to be able to write this and I am excited about the end result and what the Lord will do. But it is very much like surgery. The process is messy, painful, costly and slow going; however, I know that the result will mean much healing and growth for my heart, leading to a bright and exciting future as well as prayerfully giving hope to others.

Thank you for continuing to love and support me with your thoughts and prayers.

May our Father….our Daddy keep you safe and warm in the love of His embrace.